If you're my age, have LOVED Van Halen for decades, you remember March 24, 1986 vividly because, that afternoon, your mom took you to the local record store and you bought the VH album, "5150," Sammy Hagar's debut with the band, on both cassette AND vinyl. And, if you're like me, never before or since have you drooled over an album cover of a shirtless, Atlas-like muscleman in a thong straining to hold up that beautiful VH globe logo. Also, if you're like me, this post is a stark, heartless reminder that you are an old bastard.